Thursday, February 21, 2008
Dear Australia Post,
Ah, my darling, Australia Post... I know we've been having this tempestuous love affair for years now, we're so hot and cold with each other, our constant bickering and making up. Remember that time it took you over two weeks to send an Express Post package to me? Oh lordy, I was so angry with you! Luckily, we made up quickly when you sent something to me from Japan to Australia within 24 hours. Everyone told me it was due to the efficiency of Japan's mail, but I defended you. I knew you had it in you my Australia Post.
But the thing is, Postie, I am baffled by this letter you sent me this morning. I know, I know, I can be critical of you sometimes and yes, sometimes you are an ass, but see, I didn't think you were so... petty. I have forgiven all of your past transgressions, I haven't pursued refunds from late Express Post deliveries (which, if now we are being petty, is maybe 40% of the time), I consoled Julie Knoblock on your behalf when you lost her big package of pendants for Georgie Love, that's why, I don't know, I feel so hurt that you could just turn around and be be so cold.
Postie, as you know, I send many packages a week. I package each one carefully, with love and safely - because I know you like it a little rough! *giggle* I send so many, some with stamps, some at your outlets, so I tend to have a good idea what things cost to post. But this accusation in your letter to me that I underpaid you $3 for sending a small package... I have sent 50 of these items and they have never cost me more than $4, so really Post - who's shortchanging who?
Your large wordy letter you posted to me, printed so nicely and professionally, I can't help thinking that this whole process must have cost you MORE than the $3 you are asking from me. So this is what we've come to?
So... well... I think we should start seeing other people. I read the other day about how in the UK they now have more than one postal company to choose from. Nothing makes someone rise to the game like competition! I just think there is someone better out there for me. Someone... smarter, fitter, a real go-getter! I need to make myself available to find that someone... wherever they may be.