Friday, March 20, 2009


Our Dearest Ruby,

Can I just prefix this by saying LORDY do we love YOU. Ok? However this indecision about where you want to sleep between 3 and 6 am is, frankly, bullshit.

It's in bed and kicking, out of bed and kicking, I want food, no I don't, spit my dummy halfway across the room, where the FRICK is my dummy? I want to be swaddled and OH GOOD LORD SET ME FREE. I am half asleep and cranky and am unable to read your mind at this time. Also, is this the most appropriate time to take a crap? I am sure it's all that kicking and fussing, because you used to be a 10am girl like clockwork.

Also, you know we love you vocalising, squealing and practicing sound and vibrations in your mouth and throat, however again, not appropriate between 3 and 6am when it's obviously dark, we're quiet (ok, there is the occasional giggle when you make a remarkably loud or cute noise) and not responding to your obvious desire to play.

See, you have the luxury to nap all through the day - sometimes for 2.5-3 hours. As grown-ups, we don't have that luxury. Your nap times are when I do all that work that I have to do, so that when you wake all we have to do is hang out together, read, go for walks and play our classic showstopper "RubyFallDown".

I really, really hope your first words aren't going to be "for F*^#s Sake Ruby".

All my love,
Salmo

5 comments:

Cindy said...

Our son is 4 and I have to say he loves a "for F@# sake" if he can, especially if my huibby honks the horn in the car out it comes in an instant.
These little people they love to make sure we love them, so there is nothing better than testing out how much.

Bec said...

but look at that face, how could you possibly feel any grumpiness? she is utterly delightful and butter wouldn't melt in her mouth. i don't think she would do any of those things...she is perfect in every sense of the word! love aunty bec xx

Penny said...

Just mix some vodka in with her milk to send her to sleep. (Joking...)

potty mouth mama said...

Oh man, she is seriously funny. Love those unexpected peeps in the dark. Well, not love them so much when they wake me, but you know, they're funny, a little, ok, not really when you're trying to sleep.

Ruby, go to sleep, there's plenty of play to be had when it's SUNNY!

ButtonsByLouLou said...

Love it! I can totally relate. I have an 8 month old.