Thursday, January 27, 2011

An Exquisitely Beautiful Tale of Life, Love and Death

UN TOUR DE MANEGE from alexis liddell on Vimeo.

(thanks to all the ladies for their supportive comments from my last plus - plus sharing the candid birth stories, it was wonderful to read)

Friday, January 21, 2011

ranty pants

Ok, let me tell you about some things I am passionate about: parenting to the best of my ability, feminism, building people up instead of tearing them down, loving my partner well, and creating positive opportunities for people.  I want Ruby to be a strong minded, confident woman, who doesn't look to others for cues on her appearance or self esteem.  We are conscious of telling Ruby equally how smart and funny, as well as beautiful she is.  I want to lead by example, which is the hardest - when raised by critical female role models - I want better for her.  I want better for myself and it's a constant ongoing process of change and growth.

So I have been reading with great interest and concern the different responses to Miranda Kerr's personal birth announcement.  Women who are tearing a new mother down, saying she's not all that, that she is smug, competitive and judgemental.  Um, so what you are saying about her ISN'T judgemental and a little mean spirited?  I think people forget that when a woman gives birth people are pushing for the following information:

1. gender
2. name
3. how the birth was
4. and if you are close/or they are intrusive, questions about tearing, stitches and breastfeeding.

You know what, I saw a beautiful picture of a new mother (could have been any woman) and it made me all gooey and teary.  She was proud of giving birth and her beautiful son, but what new mother ISN'T proud after having a child, whether it be through their vagina, or through a c-section?  A woman doesn't go through 9 months of preparation and then go "yeah, I went to the hospital and they pulled this THING out of me, lord knows what I am going to do with it, certainly doesn't match our interior design choices".  Nearly every new mother is proud of the new life they have created, exhausted, joyful and in the process of falling madly in love with this new person.

Ok, so I posted the other day about preparing (mentally and physically) for an unmedicated birth.  I had one with Ruby, and I want to create the same opportunity for this new unborn babe.  For me, it's the right choice but a part of it is also that I am TERRIFIED of having a needle in my spine - that frightens me more than the pain of childbirth.  I have these (possibly irrational) fears of being the 1 in a 1,000,000 that ends up paralysed or with a long lasting spinal headache.  Also with having a 2 year old, I want to be back on my feet as soon as possible after having a baby and ready to get into the challenge of parenting 2 children.

Can I also tell you - I really don't mind how you give birth and I don't need your approval or judgement on my choices.  I wrote about it the other day because it was on my mind and it's something that is going on in my life at the moment, in the same vein of everything I write about.  What I do VERY much care about is that you and I are well, healthy and with a beautiful healthy and happy baby at the end of our pregnancies  This is the goal for every new mother and it really doesn't matter what path you take to get there - make the right choice for you and support other women who have made the right decision for them.

Man, is this topic a minefield.

My point is can we ladies please be a little nicer to each other?  Support another woman's decisions and get on each other's cheer team?  Look at a picture and see an ecstatic new mother in an intimate moment with her partner and new baby and see the joy in it, not the way it makes us feel with all our baggage and bullshit.  We need a little more happy in the world, so let's all individually bring it.

Meanwhile, as I am writing this, Ruby has been having a major tantrum on the floor because she wants raspberry yoghurt and we only have raspberry and strawberry combined.  Seriously, I am going to have another??

Thursday, January 20, 2011

this is the cutest

She & Him - Don't Look Back from Merge Records on Vimeo.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Generic updaties

OK, to begin with GEORGIE LOVE WILL BE DONATING 15% OF PROFITS FOR JANUARY TO THE QLD FLOOD RELIEF.  I wanted to donate some stuff to an auction, but I haven't found the right one yet.
Mark Ryden of course.
We are otherwise continuing to take things quietly at the moment, had a bit of a freak out at the reminder that in 6 months I will be GIVING BIRTH which while beautiful, magical and definitely miraculous, it's also... um (for those who haven't experienced that bliss before) uncomfortable.  I feel better after my first appointment at our chosen hospital and being approved for a know-your-midwife approved care (same carer throughout preg and birth and follow-up care), but I am hoping for a non-medicated birth as a choice for me and my family... so... you know suck it up Sally.    You better believe that my evenings are filled with a significant number of yoga and pilates classes in a week.  Pelvic floor exercises are go!

After the hospital appointments, the start of some little baby kicks being felt over the past week or so, and making the booking for our next scan so we can find out if it's pink or blue at our house (we have a feeling, but definitely want to know for sure!) it's all starting to feel quite real.   No cravings yet, apart from pancakes, but I can't really call those a craving, I can only call it "Wednesday".

We are already planning those first few sleepless weeks.  Going to keep Rubes in daycare for 3 days a week while I am maternity leave, we are lucky to be in a community co-op which she loves, and has had the same carers and kids to play with for the last 18 months, so I think keeping her in her routine with that regular stimulation and time away from exhausted parents and a screaming newborn is a great thing.  And if I can get over my maternal guilt for the first 8 weeks, we may see if we can do 4 days.


1. pre-made sauces
2. packet mix cakes

In order to explain that 1) DrMr is ridiculously cute in that he gets excited that he can add "cooking Thai" to his menu, which involves cutting up chicken, adding frozen vegies and a bottle of green curry thai sauce.  I grew up thinking that premade meals were pretty much FROM THE DEVIL, but you know - we are busy working parents and thanks to them when we occasionally use them, we eat something other than toast or porridge. 

2) DrMr actually prefers the taste of premade cakes to the ones I make.  Probably mostly cause I make cakes he doesn't like (banana, carrot and a really odd-tasting zucchini one the other day).  Rubes loves to bake (lick the bowl), so it's super east to get her involved.

Rubes meanwhile insists that men do not have a penis or testicles, they in fact carry their poos to their front, and obviously in their pants.  DrMr is perturbed by the idea that his child believes he keeps poo in his pants all day.  She refuses to hear otherwise.  She was wearing a plastic gold beaded necklace around her tummy the other day, with a longer section hanging down in between her legs.  "look Mummy! Look at my poos!  Gold poos!".

That photo above illustrates one of the happiest days in Rubes life - the three of us got to ride on Thomas the Tank engine through our local shopping centre last weekend (yes, she is kissing him).  As adults, people came up after the ride was over and actively mocked us after seeing us on it.  People, people please - obviously you have no idea of how willing I am to humiliate myself.for the sake of entertaining my child.I LEARNED and regularly PERFORMED (with red blanket) the iggle piggle dance to entertain her.

Fortunately, now as a mature 2 year old who has grown out of her iggle piggle obsession and is instead fascinated by Charlie and Lola and all I have had to do now is learn how to make pink milk (our recipe : milk, strawberries, dash of pure maple syrup).

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Hell and high water.

I can't stop reading the news about the floods.  One of my oldest friends lives in Brisbane and I always assumed they would be safe, but they spent the afternoon stocking up on candles and torch batteries, formulating plans if their house was flooded, that they would be ok with 2 meters and any more would mean their house would be destroyed and you know, they know that they need to get on the roof if it gets worse than that with their 18 month old daughter and 2 dogs. She was just hoping her partner got home from work in the CBD before the river broke and they would be separated.  I think that is the thing that affected me the most, when watching the coverage on just about every station last night - imagining waiting on a roof, with DrMr, Ruby and Georgie.  Trying to explain to a terrified and wet 2 year old that we couldn't go inside because it was wet and unsafe, and that we would have to sit in the pouring rain, waiting to be rescued, when help was unable to get to us because of the terrible weather.  And just waiting. 

It breaks my heart.  Donate if you can.  We are looking for a way for Georgie Love to contribute and will have some ideas soon.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

BELATEDLY, I wanted to say a really, really big thank you for all the well wishes for bebe number 2.  Am starting to feel a lot more human in this second trimester, which you know, helps with the overall doing of stuff.  My belly popped in the past few days and now I look about 5 months pregnant, which you know is awesome. UGH.

I can't actually get motivated to do anything.  I was feeling pretty rotten until recently, so when Rubes went down for her nap (which is a minimum of 2 hours, sometimes 4), I would hope straight into bed and sleep or read a book or just rest.  It's AWESOME and I CAN'T STOP.  So unlike my beautiful crazypants Rubes, I am predicting this bebe will be the most chilled out, relaxed human in existence,  

Tuesday, January 04, 2011

Explained absences

Baby number 2 is due mid July.  THANK GOODNESS this first trimester is over, because seriously the morning sickness was awful and I have mostly been antisocial and hermity for 13 weeks.  Starting to come out of that funk and feeling like a normal human being again.  With a compulsive need for pancakes, a whippersnipper and more cupboard space.
How are you fairing post Christmas and New Years?  We are still living in toy town, can barely move for all the toys in the house, plus Rubes is obsessed with stickers, so there are stickers EVERYWHERE - lots of random Charlie and Lola pieces here and there.  There was a Sizzles the Dog sticker stuck on the floor next to the dining table for about 4 days before I caved and peeled it off.  If you sit on the couch too long, you might find a scrap of about 50 different things stuck to your leg.

We are still all in holiday mode.

STILL trying to figure out where all the Christmas toys are going to fit.  It's not even like a tetris game, everything is just kind of crammed in and shifted as needs change in the living room.

No one is putting the washing away, if you want clean clothes, just grab something out of the basket (actually, this is a farce and I can't really claim that this is a holiday thing).

My 2011 resolution is (and DrMr's too, coincidentally) is to learn to cook more.  Food is such a drama in our house, but we both want to learn how to cook more things - and more things we BOTH like.  We need inspiration and a wider rotating menu.

I also need to learn how to ice freaking cupcakes.  I am clearly no Masterchef.